About the Blogger

Hello reader! My name is Robin.

I’m from Toronto, Ontario and have lived

here my whole life. I am a Stigma Smasher.

Some Factoids

I hold 6 diagnoses as of tonight as I write

this. They are as follows:

  • Borderline Personality Disorder

  • Bipolar II

  • Social Anxiety Disorder

  • Major Depression

  • Eating Disorder

  • ADHD

Seems like a lot, cause it is.

But honestly, even just having one of

these would be a lot for anyone and

I’m not here to minimize anyone’s struggle.

Mental illness is fucking tough,

no matter how many or how little you have.

Do you take medication for

Mental Health, Robin?

Why, yes, reader, I do!

I take Abilify (atypical antipsychotic) and

Cipralex (antidepressant)!

They’re a great combination for me right now.

Some Back story

So, I have a history of mental health

difficulties in my own life that reach all the

way back to childhood. I also have a history of

mental health concerns in my lineage on both

maternal and paternal sides.

I have a history of being traumatized, and

re-traumatized. I suffered the affects of

PTSD for the better part of my 20 years.

I have been hospitalized 8 times,

and I’m writing this from my inpatient room

at the Centre for Mental Health and Addictions

in Toronto.

The Turning Point

After my last hospitalization in 2016,

I hadn’t been in formal therapy.

I thought everything was within my control.

Peeps, was I wrong.

Things started to deteriorate when I went to

college. I was studying Mental Health and

Addictions, but I wasn’t acknowledging the

warning signs of crisis. I knew the content was

triggering me, but I wanted so badly to be


I wasn’t okay, though. And I wasn’t safe.

I had relapsed with one of my

target behaviours and my eating disorder

had my health all over the place.

I had no supports in terms of therapy.

I felt the lack of clinical support like a sheet

of lead over my body. In the winter of 2018,

I attempted suicide.

Stigma around mental health had clouded

my ability to judge when I need to reach out.

The doctors at the Peterborough Regional

Health Centre chose not to admit me to

inpatient. I continued to pretend I was alright

and that my symptoms weren’t worsening.

I dropped out of my program and started

working again. My anxiety got worse and

worse, hopelessness spread through my

thoughts like dark ink in a glass of water.

My boyfriend, Garrett, brought me to

CAMH on Tuesday, the 15th of January, 2019.

Five days ago.

And in these five days I’ve decided to

actually start prioritizing my mental wellness,

and of course, smashing stigma.

I realized I need to take my health seriously.

I can’t continue to treat myself like my

illnesses are irrelevant. Nor can I pretend

stigma doesn’t affect my choices when it

comes to seeking help.

Before, I neglected myself.

Now, I’m surviving.